Night of the Vampiress

A vampiress from the past reeks havoc in Jake's world. And an old "friend" returns.


Chapter I The Unleashing,

It was 2 am and Yoto City was quiet....except when it came to 3 groups of people.  On the south side of town Ralph, former treasurer of "The Black Cats", was returning home after celebrating having severed all ties to the Black Cats. Although he had done so before they had captured Mato, he had finally had the opportunity to put the group of criminal's funds to good use; charity.  He thought life was going well; that is, until Barbra, one of the rouge Black Cats that had escaped arrest, shoved him into an alley.
"Where is it?" Barbra asked Ralph.
"Where's what?"
"The emergency fund that to get our people out of jail, you idiot. I know you went all goody goody on us and took the money, but I want it now, or I'll do bad things to you."
"I'm sorry, I gave it all to charity."
"Okay. Prepare to have bad things happen to you."
"Wait!"
"What?"
"A week ago I came across this abandoned warehouse. I went inside to see if I could find some kinda historical artifact in there. I instead found a huge store house of cash, gold, jewels and other things. I put it in the cemetary in the grave with the cross. It's all yours; I don't want it anymore. I'm gonna get all my money honestly."
"Grave with the cross huh? I wonder what poor sap you took the goods from."

The scene shifts to Dawn standing in an empty warehouse with a twitchy eye.
"You have got to be kidding me!!! No one steals what I already stole!"

As Barbra ran off towards the cemetery past the school, Mina and Diana were in the baseball field with a big cauldron before them.
"Okay, why are we here at 2 a.m.?" asked Diana.
"Because I want to try out this summon angel familiar spell for extra credit," Mina replied, "and I need a witness to say that I did it."
"But why at 2 a.m.?"
"Because good things usually happen to me at 2 a.m.. Now, Angelous Formus Ginormous Kiosk!!"  The caldron bubbled loudly before huge bolt of lightening shot towards the heavens.
"Shoot! It didn't work."
"What did you do then?"
"I have no idea."
"That's it. I'm going to bed."

While Mina and Diana were magicing it up, Jake was awake playing the MMORPG "Elfworld", where players would play as blood thirsty elves battling computer controlled creatures as well as having the options of fighting other players. Jake was playing late at night because Katia found the game offensive to elf kind and would smash his computer if she saw him playing it. He was in the middle of fighting a fellow gamer since they had called him a n00b and insulted his armor color.
grlNhevin attacks 36 damage to Captain_Anime913                 
Captain_Anime913 attacks: Critical hit                                         
grlNhevin has lost their internet connection                         
"Wow! I hit her so hard it knocked her off the internet... wait, is that even possible? Man, I need some energy.  Playing "Elfworld"  for 12 hours can really take it out of a guy.  I think I'll have one of Mato's energy drinks........ but only half a can this time. Man, I'll never forget that last time."
The scene flashbacks to  Jake, who is super wide eyed and his whole body is literally vibrating. "HeyKatiaHeyJenHeyMinaHeyDianaboyohboyitsureisgreattobealiveIthinkI'llrunamarathonwowIcan'tfeelmyteethIhaven'tblinkedin3days!!!!!" The flash back ends.
Jack walked into the kitchen. Osaka, the Kai of hypnosis, was nonchalantly sitting at the table
"Yo." 
Jake continued on his journey and grabbed the can, opened it took a sip, and then finally realized Osaka was there, resulting in a spit take.  "AAAAA!!! What are you doing here!! You're not here to make my friends try to kill me again?!!"
" If you'd stop YELLING, I could tell you." 
"Will you shut up!! People are trying to sleep!!" Jen cried from upstairs.
"As I was saying, I didn't come here to do anything to you.  That little magic girl you're in love with zapped me down here accidentally."
"WHAT?!! MINA AND I ARE JUST FRIENDS!"
"What did I just say!! If you don't shut up I'll start summoning heavy weights to fall out of the sky on you."
"My beloved can yell as loud as he wants Jen! So why don't you be quiet?"
"Don't start with me elfy!"
"I WANT TO YELL ABOUT STUFF TOO!" Shouted Yuta.
Jake meanwhile was downstairs with his face in his hand. "There's nothing worse then a shouting match between Jen, Yuta, and Katia. Also, how am I going to explain you to the girls?"
"Just tell them the truth."
"What? That you're hypnosis incarnate and once hypnotized them to hunt me down like some anima?."
"When I snapped them out of their trances they forgot about me ever being here. So why not try the truth, minus that whole turning them against you thing."
"I guess that could work. So you ,uh, are staying here?"
"Yup."
"Great....I guess you could crash on the couch......do higher beings even get sleep?"
"Noooooo, we stay up all night and feast on the succulent meat of unicorns and drink royal nectar."
"Well goodnight, queen of sarcasm," Jake said as he went back upstairs.

Barbra had finally reached the cemetery and was standing at the gates, sweat dropping.
"Oh, sure, it's in the grave with a cross........90% of these graves have crosses. Oh well, time to look for treasure and reduce some stress." Barbra began systematically kicking over gravestones, showing no respect for the dead whatsoever.  As she reached the back of the cemetery she saw an old cross that was rather sizable. "Ha, what better way to hide a ton of stuff then in a big cross." She kicked it over and it yielded nothing. She started walking away mumbling when the ground beneath her gave way and she tumbled into a large tomb with a coffin on a stone slab covered in chains. She pulled out her Black Cat standard issue chain cutting tool and made short work of the chains. "Pretty clever, Ralph. No one would think of looking in a coffin. Fortunately I'm immune to faux pas." She ripped open the coffin and saw only a skeleton inside. Her attention was then directed to the crumbling brick wall at the other end of the tomb and walked over to it. "Pretty shoddy masonry, Ralph." She said as she began digging.
The skeleton, meanwhile, was far from dead anymore, as it's eyes began to glow and it's rotting organs began to pulsate and work again as ragged flesh began to form around the corpse's body, and the skull which featured fanged teeth. Barbra had just finished looking around behind the wall and gotten up when she saw the zombieish looking thing rising out of the coffin. "And then I ran." Barbra tore out of the tomb like a bat out of Hell and right into a cemetery security guard. She quickly recovered and continued running, only to be close lined by an angel statue. As she got up she saw the vampire attacking the security guard.  As he went unconscious from the vampire draining him Barbra saw the vampire begin to restore itself even faster so that it now took on the appearance of a young woman with deep blue eyes and silvery white hair. Barbra began running again but soon found the vampire had caught up with her and had cut her off.
"Oh, please don't kill me," Barbra pleaded. "I wanna live. I have so much to live for. So many crimes to commit."
The vampire's eyes began to glow. "Look into my eyes. Feel your will fading and your obedience growing.  You will serve Countess Luna."
"How may I serve you my mistress?" Barbra said with her eyes glazing over.
"I require a sentry to watch my coffin in the day time..... My, the world has changed since those accursed hunters Mato and Sai vanquished me.  But I sense this new world has grown ignorant and fearless which will make feeding on them all the more easy." Luna then reached into herself and pulled out a dark gem. "Let the black crystal of Omnispare bring to this city from summer to a winter of despair!!" The crystal shattered and the dust drifted up into the air.
"What did you do, my mistress?" Barbra asked
"I changed this city from summer to winter so that the nights may last longer. Now take me on a tour of this city. I need to feed.  Then when I have my full strength I can gather the things necessary to perform the ritual to plunge this city into total darkness, so that my children of the night may live here without fear of the sun."
"What do you require, my mistress?"
"Transantium and the soul of an elf princess. But now I must feed."

Chapter II Life with Osaka
Yuta, Sarah, Fawn, Katia, Mato, Jen, and Lucia all stared at Osaka as Jake explained the situation.
"So let me get this straight.....you're essentially a god of hypnosis." Sarah asked.
"Yup."
"Greetings. I am Katia, Princess of the Elf Nation.  My family's always had a close relationship with all higher beings and I'm very happy to meet one in person. However, if you don't move 3 inches to the left away from my Jake I'll stab you with a fork."
"Katia, I don't think it's wise to threaten someone that's hypnosis incarnate," Lucia said.
"Ah, she must be the smart one of the crew," Osaka said.
Jake and the other girls fell down.
"Fawn, you look down," Jake noticed. "What's up?"
"My concert got cancelled because of the snow."
"Snow? But it's August."
"I know."
"I know too," said Mato, "Which is why it's my newest project to find out where this weather change came from. If some scientist has a weather machine before I do... oh my, but they're going to pay.  To the lab!!!"
"Wow, he's a little spazz isn't he," Osaka said.
"Welcome to my home," Jake replied. "Jen, you seem upset."
"Ya. First you guys make all kinds of noise at all hours; then I find out you've brought in another mouth to feed. And to top it off, she's a real higher up who won't pull her weight like some people I know.
"Hey," Osaka retorted. "I'm no snobby royal. I'll clean up after myself; I'll even cook."
Dawn soon came inside the house looking angry.
"My, someone looks chipper this morning." Sarah said.
"Cram it. Someone cleaned out my storehouse."
"I'd love to meet that someone so I could hug them."
Dawn then walked off mumbling.

Outside Mina and Diana were taking part in Take Two of Mina's summoning attempt.
"Okay, why are we doing this again?" Diana asked.
"Because we failed the first time."
"Why are we doing this in front of Jake's house?"
"So that if we fail and something crazy happens, people will just blame Mato."
"Oh."
"Angelous Formus Ginormous Kiosk"

Inside the house Dawn was still complaining about the theft of the stuff she had stolen, "Oh but I got the scent of his life force and he's so gonna pay."
*Wham!!*
"What was that?" Jake asked.
Jake, Osaka, Katia, and Sarah all ran outside to see Mina and Diana looking dumbfounded at a giant creature.
   "What is that?!!" Jake said
"It looks like a giant frog," Diana remarked.
" True, but frogs aren't purple. What did you do?" Jake asked Mina.
"I was just trying to summon an angel familiar," she answered.
"That's about as non-angel as you can get," Katia noted.
"Maybe you should kiss it and turn it into a giant prince." Osaka quiped
" Not now!!"
" Besides," the Kai of hypnosis continued, "that's not a frog."
" Then what is it?"
" It's the Kai of water. Apparently your friend's miscasting of her spell knocked it out of the non-earthly realm just like me."
"Can you talk to it?"
"Of course. Yo, Chad what's up?
"Chad?"
"Ribbit."
"Ya I know. I'm in the same boat as you." 
"Ribbit."
"What do you mean I owe you ten bucks?"
"Ribbit Ribbit."
" That was a joke, not a bet! If you don't make it rain for a month the humans will notice. Yeesh, can't you understand sarcasm?"
"Ribbit Ribbit."
"I'd move if I were you," Osaka told Jake.
"Why?" Jake asked. Chad's tongue shot out and wrapped around Jake before pulling him into Chad's mouth.
"......because he said he's hungry."
"Jake!!" Katia, Sarah, Mina, and Diana screamed.
" Spit him out right now!!" Katia shouted
"Ya spit the boy out. You don't know where he's been," Osaka warned her fellow Kai.
"This is not a time to be funny. The love of my life is in there."
" If you spit him out I promise I'll help you find a noodle stand." Chad spat Jake out. Jake got up. He was completely drenched and covered in God only knows what. "EEEEha eeeha eeeeha..... I've been violated." Jake said before passing out.
An hour or two later after cleaning up Jake walked into the living room just as Jessica ran in wearing a sweat suit and a sweatshirt.
"Man, crazy weather we're having. I went out for a jog in my summer workout cloths and the second I stepped out, this freak cold wave hit and I immediately ran back in and threw on my winter gear over my summer gear."
"What do you normally wear in the summer?"
"Oh, you know, a sports bra and some short shorts."
Jake gulped. His hormones got the best of him as he pulled out his pendant. He then held it up and began swinging it before Jessica's eyes.
"Jessica...You're feeling very tired.....You're also feeling very warm....You just keep on feeling warmer and warmer......You really need to get out of that warm winter exercise gear."
Jessica began to obey and began an impromptu strip tease for Jake when Osaka snuck up behind him.
"Haven't learned your lesson, I see."
"Oh dear God please don't kill me...or have them kill me."
"Nah you're in the clear.....for now. I just wanted to see the look on your face. Well carry on I'm gonna go get some tacos. Tacos!! Tacos!!"
Jake stood in the living room for a moment still dumbstruck.  All the while Osaka continued to chant 'tacos' over and over even after she left the house.
"That was weird," Jake said as he eyed the now summer wear sporting Jessica and practically began drooling

Later that night, Jake was asleep with dreams of a sexy sports wear clad Jessica dancing in his head when Homeshield gave him a light shock to wake him up.
"Warning. Break-in at the Tranantium storage facility."
"Can't the police do it?"
"Police are busy with a large fire downtown."
"Awww nuts. Stupid fire, making me get up at this hour. Making me go out in the cold. I bet the police are warm."
Jake quickly got into the Captain Anime Armor and was driving towards the scene in the Dasher.
"Just what is Transantium anyways?"
"It's a metal that was prominent in the old days that has come into popularity today since it's one of the few things that can resist Mato's metal eating termites."
"Why would he build metal eating termites.....wait that's a stupid question. It's Mato, he doesn't need a reason."
Jake soon arrived at the facility and began looking around.
"Kinda lax in their security detail," Jake thought before a big crash came from inside. Inside he found the Vampiress Luna holding several pieces of Transantium with a collapsed pile next her.
"Hey. Who or what are you?"
"My, my, the times certainly have changed. It seems that even females may be knights in this time."
A traditional sweat drop formed on Jake before his rage got the better of him.  He grew large and began shouting at the now chibi sized vampires, "Hey, it's not my fault this stuff came in pink. I'm a guy!! A guy!!"
"In my days I'd rip a man's heart out for spitting on me while yelling at me."
"I bet you were a riot at parties. Now are you gonna come quietly or am I going to have to get rough?"
"Oh I like it rough, little hunter." Luna said flashing a fanged grin.
"You're...You're a vampire?"
"Suprised, little one?"
"Nothing in this world really surprises me anymore.. well, except for that giant frog, but that's another story... and hey, I'm just as tall as you are. So if you aren't gonnna go quietly take this." Jake charged forward and went to punch Luna in the face, but she merely caught his fist and began to crush it a little before tossing him into a pile of Transantium like a rag doll.  Jake soon got up and charged at Luna again and kicked her across the side of the head, but that had the effect of, well, it had no effect at all, and Luna just tossed Jake aside again.
"Okay, new plan. Firepower all the way."  Jake let loose a barrage of lasers and missiles, causing a big dust filled explosion where Luna was. "Okay, if memory serves me right the enemy usually appeared unscathed from all those clouds of dust every anime ever.  So please let there be no vampire emerging from that dust cloud."
The dust blew away and Luna stood there unscathed.
"Aw crap."
"A very spectacular light show. But rather pointless." Luna ran forward at a fast speed and caught Jake off guard and hit him so hard he flew into a bunch of empty crates and smashed them to pieces.
In a panic Jake grabbed two pieces and made a makeshift cross. "Ha ha try and hit me now."
Luna suddenly appeared before him. "Fool. That is a lower case T." She casually smacked the pieces of timber aside and punched Jake hard in the stomach.
"Oh God!! My spleen!!"
Luna then turned into her mistual form and surrounded Jake before she reformed around him so that she had him in a death hug.
"AAAA Homeshield! AAAA!! Proximity Alert!! AAA
"Proximity alert acknowledged."  Electricity began flowing through the powersuit and shocking Luna......to no affect.
"Ooo that tingles."
"Aw crap."
"Warning circuit overload."
Part of the Captain Anime costume exploded, separating the two. Jake got up with the front half of the suit cracked and several sections missing. "That's it I'm out of here." He quickly ran to the Dasher and beat a hasty retreat. "If she's gonna be around for awhile I'm gonna have to upgrade my weaponry."
Arriving back at the Mato house Jake stumbled out of the Dasher pausing as he passed Osaka who was tossing cartons of noodles into Chad's mouth.
"Wow, you look like hell, and I've seen you get eaten by Chad."
"Not now."
"You got beaten up by a vampire, didn't you?"
"How'd you know that?"
"One of my fellow Kai's is a vampire. I know a vampire beating when I see one."
"So does that mean you're gonna help me? Since you know about vampires?"
"No."
Jake sweat dropped, "Why? I'm sure as a vampire she's been abusing her hypnotic gaze."
"Like I said my friend is a vampire. I'm against me hurting other vampires...you can hurt them all you want though."
"You're the laziest contentious objector in the world."
"Thanks."
Jake weakly walked into the house and down into the lab. He placed the PAT suit in the repair bay and entered commands on a computer to coat the armor in a thing layer of garlic and give it garlic and holy water based weapons. Then he walked upstairs and turned on the shower and began to enjoy the water rushing over him when....
"Hey whose running that noisy shower at this hour?" Yuta yelled.
"I'm sure it's just my beloved making sure he's the cleanest for me," Katia responded.
"Hey, I like Jake too."
"Cram it, you talking trash compactor."
"I could make you think you're a trash compactor!!"
"Just try it!!!"
A loud struggle could be heard ensuing in the hall. Giving up on having a peaceful shower, Jake got out, dried off, and got back into his bed cloths. After stepping over the twisted fighting mass that was Yuta and Katia, he flopped down on the bed.

Chapter III The Party
A week later, Dawn entered the graveyard looking around. She had tracked down Ralph by sensing his lifeforce's trace energy that was present in her store house. Then she had hypnotized him into revealing where he stored her loot....but not before draining him. She made her way over to the crypt and made her way through it sensing all the vampiric eyes focused on her. She soon entered the main part of the crypt and saw Barbra standing by the coffin.
"Ah, so you must be the one he talked about. Trying to steal my fortune."
"Please. Leave. My mistress gets quite angry."
Dawn merely pushed her aside. "So you're just a hypnotized pawn, huh? Unless you call someone else mistress then that's just kinky. Where's the money?"
"Please do not disturb my mistress's coffin.  It will make her most angry."
"Ah, so that must be where the loot is."  Dawn ripped off the lid of the coffin and sees Luna lying there, "Nice corpse. Anyways.... Wah!"
Luna suddenly grabbed Dawn and pulled her into the coffin, slamming the lid shut. A lot of scuffling and screaming ensued from within.
"Oooo, breakfast in bed." Barbara said.

That morning at the Mato house, Yuta and Katia were sitting on either side of Jake arguing yet again. Osaka was sitting across from him tossing her pocket watch in the air and catching it and tossing it again. "Please can I do it?" she asked Jake. "It'll make life better for both of us."
"For the last time, no."
"You're no fun."
"Lets just say that when you hypnotize my friends the results usually aren't too pleasant."
Mato suddenly emerged from the lab. "Good news everyone. I've been invited to a fancy dinner party that's being held in honor of one of my inventions."
"Since when do they give parties for WMDs?" Jen asked.
"Oh, it's nothing of the sort.  I used an old formula from one of my ancestors to create an artificial sunlight generator. I think the name of the stuff I use in it is  sun-to-go"
"Hey, that's the stuff one of your ancestors used to slay a vampire!" Jake said.
"Oh pish posh Jake. Everyone knows vampires and all that are just magical brew haha."
Jake looked around at the table where a genie, an angel, a Kai of hypnosis, and a magic girl were seated. "Okayyyyyyy; apparently you haven't been living the same life as I have for the past several months."
"Anyways, as my "Grandson", you are allowed to come along with a female escort, nudge nudge, wink wink."
Jake suddenly felt 9 pairs of eyes focus on him. "Geee, thanks, Mato. You just tied steaks to me and fed me to the proverbial sharks."
The girls began an all out battle against each other with Jake watching in total shock and Osaka watching while eating a taco. In the end, Katia and Yuta's fighting scared the others off. Jake had had enough.
"Okay, that's enough. I know how I'm gonna settle this. Before I came to Yoto I was extremely popular and often when it came to choosing such things as lab partners and other things I'd choose the least deserving person so as not to make my legion of friends jealous."
"That's a lie and you know it," Osaka said.
"Ding ding we have a winner," Jake said.
"Wow, I didn't even know I was in the running," Osaka said, "Gee who do I thank...let's see the little people...oh and these two for being scarily obsessed."
Katie walked up to Osaka and was nearly eye to eye to her. "Okay you may be a higher being and I respect my Jake's decisions, but if you get too near my future husband I'll make horrible things happen to you." Katia then stomped off.
"Wow she took that better then I thought." Jake said.
"Ya."
"Now what are we gonna do about tonight? Mato said it's formal and unless you got blasted down here with more then that sexy casual wear outfit we're gonna need to get you a formal dress/gown. Let's see. I don't think Jen would conjure one up for you after you hypnotized her into doing embarrassing stuff while you taped her and sent it into that funny home videos show to earn 10,000 dollars. And if you borrowed one of Katia's dresses she'd kill you."
."Don't worry, I can change my clothes into anything I want. Just watch as a snap of my fingers changes my outfit into an elegant gown." Oska snapped her fingers and her street cloths faded away, but nothing new appeared on her. Jake went wide eyed and blood spurted out of his nose. He ran off to wipe up as Katia charged into room screaming a primal battle cry.
Later Jake and Osaka, now in a nice navy blue gown, were walking up the stairs of a big mansion. Jake was noticeably angry.
"Stop being a such a grumpy Gus. It's a party....Wooo!!"
"I know she tackled you and tried to ram your head into a wall, but did you have to hypnotize Katia into being addicted to the home shopping network."
"Geez, I even went light on her since I thought you'd freak out if I had gone through with my original suggestion."
"Dare I ask what that was?"
"Make her think she was a ghost and laugh as she freaked out thinking she had died."
"I'd prefer you didn't entrance my friends period. It makes me nervous when you do."
"For the last time I'm not going to have them go after you....yeeesh.  Now I got a hankering for some hor's dourves. Do you think they serve tacos at a black tie event?"
As the party progressed Jake and Osaka began to mingle. Though being from a different dimension and being a being of hypnosis incarnate made making up plausible back stories somewhat difficult, Jake at least had being Mato's "Grandson" as cover.
"Oh Jake, it's nice to see you," said a blonde haired skinny governor's wife type women.  "Mato told me so many good things about you. And who is your lovely lady friend?"
Osaka smiled over plate which was piled when an unnatural amout of hor's dourves, and even more surprisingly had tacos as part of the hor's dourves collection, "Hi, I'm Osaka Hallstingdingdingtonsworth; I'm a sleep researcher."
"Oh that must be lovely. You must work with such a lively bunch. Hahahahahahah."
"No, I work with snotty trophy wives wondering how they can sleep so much despite having no job or doing anything else meaningful to society."
"Hhhmph. Well I never." She walks off clearly disgusted.
"Well Ms. Hallstingdingding...whatever. Your social skills never cease to amaze me."
"Quiet. I hate those richy types. Hold my plate, please. I'm gonna get a drink." She handed her plate off to Jake, and the sheer mass of it caused him to be driven to the ground.
"Good god! Do you have an insane metabolism or something?"
After she had been gone for twenty minutes she finally returned.
"Long line?"
"No. I just saw two actresses I just had to hypnotize."
"I pray that's like a Kai of hypnosis's form of having an autograph collection."
"Nope. I just wanted to get revenge on them for making me waste my money on their last several crappy movies"
"You live on a higher earthly plain yet you still believe in money... wait a minute, why am I concerned about that? I should be more concerned about what you did to those actresses."
Jake's concerns were soon met as two hot girls came tearing into the room on all fours. The one in the lead was meowing while the other was barking at her. The guests looked on in horror, Jake sweat dropped and Osaka took a picture.
"It's too bad the other two I really don't like weren't here tonight or I would've set up a worm chased by a bird chased by a cat chased by a dog scenario."
"Actually I think that's the best thing in the world that could've happened up at this point. At the rate you're going I think it would've been less socially awkward at this party for me to take both Katia and Yuta."
After awhile Osaka calmed down as they were actually mingling with people she enjoyed the company of. Jake and them were gathered around the Sunlight Generator Mato had built. A woman with white hair wearing a navy blue cloak was nearby.
Jake introduced himself, "Hi, I'm Jake Mato."
"You're name is of no importance to me," replied Luna, whom Jake did not recognize even after the beat down he received from her.
"Woo Hoo! I am no longer the least socially acceptable person at the party!" Osaka exclaimed.
"Fine be that way," Jake said.
Not noticing Jake's disdain, Luna asked, "What is this thing?"
"That's my grandfather's invention. It takes a special chemical mixture and turns it into a beam of pure sunlight that can go from a concentrated point to a wide arc to illuminate a large area.  It's cheaper then most industrial lighting and will hopefully be used for night road construction which is especially necessary after the recent robot beaver attacks that destroyed many bridges and overpasses......" He quickly whispered to himself, "Wait. How'd I know all that? And why am I telling her after she was a condescending jerk?"
"I took the liberty of hypnotizing you to remembering what it did so you wouldn't sound like an idiot when someone asked and you didn't know," Osaka said, overhearing him talking to himself.
"Uh, did you hypnotize me to do anything else?" Jake asked with a bit of venom in his voice.
"Only to want to orgy with the girls every time you hear a bell."
Jake stood there wide eyed with his jaw dropped.
"I kid. I kid."
"I really don't like you right now."
They're little whispering tirade was interrupted by Luna, "Well it's about time this pathetic race did something useful with that accursed sun.  That ball of light has been nothing but an everlasting annoyance since the dawn of time. Use this invention wisely while you still can." She looked around and saw everyone staring at her with blank eyes and anime style shock lines their faces. "I mean. It's a lovely machine. Excuse me I must go now."
As she's left Jake noticed as she walked by the large mirror in the front hall she cast no reflection, "Uh oh," he thought.

Later that night after the party Jake had the group, minus Diana and Dawn, gathered in Mato's lab.
"I suppose you're wondering why I asked you all to come here."
"Yes," They all said.
"Well, after doing research for an hour then realizing I knew the answer already since I read about it before when I should have been studying I found out a vampiric guest at the party tonight was none other Countess Luna, an evil Vampire defeated by Mato's ancestor and a very skilled female vampire hunter. It's all here in this history book....well the stuff about the ancestors; but I know what I saw."
"Great, now we got a vampire and a succubus running around," Sarah moaned.
"I'm all ready to kick some butt," Jessica added.
"Let's go get her, big brother!"
"I will not allow my beloved be put in that kind of danger."
"Wait," Jake said. "You mean you actually believe me? After what Mato said about vampires?"
"We stopped listening to Mato ages ago."
"So what's your plan, Jake?" Yuta asked.
"Well I thought I'd use the time grabber Mato invented a while back to grab the vampire hunter and bring her here to our time. Since she's really the only one to defeat a vampire of this caliber."
"Uhh, Jake grabbing someone from the past and bringing them here sounds like a bad idea," Jessica said.
"Dont' worry; most bad ideas tend to turn out great," Jake said.
"Oh I gotta hear the logic surrounding that statement," Osaka said.
"Shut up," Jake said reaching into the time grabber's portal, "Let's see here...not her, not her, don't know what that is....definitely not her....aaaaaaa! Hot! Hot!...Aaaaa Cold cold cold!!......AAAAAAA Knife knife knife knife!!"
"How do you know what she's gonna feel like? Have you ever copped a feel on vampire hunter from the past?" Osaka asked.
"How dare you accuse my Jake of such things!" Katia shouted.
"Ahha got her!" Jake cried as he reached in and pulled out a young girl with shoulder length green hair who wore a long cloak and a form fitting leather armor of some sort.  Vials of holy water were strapped across her chest like a modern day solider would strap machine gun rounds across their chest.  A sword hilt was strapped to her side. She looked around in confusion, " Where the Hell am I?!"
"Er um. Hi uhhh Sai uhhh I'm Jake and this may sound a little crazy but I brought you from the past to the future cause I'm 99% sure Countess Luna's back and we need your help. Let me be the first to welcome you to uhhhh Mato's Lab!!" *Fanfare and streamers went off in the background.
"What!! You mean that hellspawn is back? After I put so much effort into sealing her away I.... Wait, did you say Mato?"
"Ya. I think his ancestor was an old partner of yours."
"You mean that insane man-child scientist was actually allowed to reproduce!!!"
"Uh ya sorry to disappoint....but how about it, will you help out with eliminating the  vampire?"
"Of course...Though I can't help but feel bad for the fair maiden that mothered that child."
"I prefer not to think about it," Jake said, "Let me give you the grand tour. This is the lab. I imagine you could use it to make any manner of vampire killing implements and chemicals."
"I'll merely need to it make a cure for those who have suffered the bite of the Luna."
"Alrighty. Upstairs we have the house. The bedrooms. Out front we have the uhhh Giant Purple Frog of Doom."
"He has a name," Osaka said.
"Anything that tries to eat me will only be known as 'something of Doom' from now on," Jake said.
"It tried to eat you?" Sai asked?
"Long story," Jake said.
"I need to get to the local smithy and bow repair shop before I am to go out on the hunt."
"I can do you one better," Jake said.

An hour later Sai was on her knees doing silent prayer as they stood outside Violence R' Us.

That night Diana was walking to the store to get some tuna when someone approached her.
"Hello little one," Luna said.
"Who...Who are you?" Diana said backing up.
"My, I've never seen something like you. You're like that cat demon I created....and yet you're not."
Diana turned to run but Luna appeared in front of her grabbing her shoulders. "Look into my eyes little one." Luna said her eyes beginning to glow.
"Eeep," was all Diana could manage before falling under the vampiress's spell.
"Yes, look into my eyes, only my eyes. Your mind is clear and your will is gone; you will do whatever I tell you."
"Yes mistress," Diana said.
"You will make a fine solider in my army of the undead....just like that succubus," Luna said just as she bit down on Diana's neck.

Later that night Homeshield went off again.
"Bank robbery in progress."
"Can't the police get it?"
"It's a blood bank robbery."
"Ohhhh well time to get the huntress."
Jake went downstairs to find Osaka sitting at the table eating a taco. Sai's head is resting on the table.
"Please in the name of all things good and holy don't tell me you hypnotized her."
"She wouldn't sleep. She just kept on preparing and preparing. And I thought the elf princess was the very definition of crazily obessed."
"Could you wake her up? Someone set off the alarm in a blood bank. I'm 90% sure it's a vampire. And... wait, since when do you care about peoples health?"
"That's not really important right now," Osaka said snapping her fingers.
Sai woke up, "Oh I must have dozed off."
"Ya you could call it that," Jake said.
"What's going on?"
"Vampire sighting."
Sai leapt up showing off the array of weaponry she had strapped across her chest.
"That must have been the shopping spree nightmares are made of," Jake said activating his Captain Anime Suit.
"What's with the armor?" Sai asked
"Oh, this is my, uh, vampire and criminal hunting armor, but you can't tell anyone about it. What I do is kinda frowned upon."
"And like an idiot I revealed my secret identity to someone," Jake thought.
"I understand. I often had to put on a veil of secrecy when hunting. I adapted the persona of the Shadow Shredder."
As they got into the Dasher and sped off, Jake began to think why he didn't choose a cool name like the Shadow Shredder, but his train of thought was broken when Sai asked about the pink armor.

After a few minutes of Jake keeping his anger in check they arrived at the blood bank.
"So this is a repository for blood."
"Ya, it's so it can go out and be used to help people."
"It's more like a feast for vampires and a stupid idea if you ask me," Sai said.
Inside they found a nurse/manager on the floor with two teeth marks in her neck. Sai pulled out a jet injector and injected the nurse with something.
"I'm glad someone showed me this unique device. I no longer have to coat an arrow with my vampire cure and shoot it into someone's heart for it to work."
As they made their way deeper into the building they could hear a weird gurgling noise and glass chinking. As they entered the blood storage room Luna emerged from around a corner with an armful of blood filled test tubes.
"You!" Sai and the Vampire both shouted. Sai pulled out a crossbow loaded with a wood steak and fired at the vampiress. Luna quickly dodged it.
"Damn. She's hopped up on blood; she'll be faster and stronger then before."
"Oh yeah. Well I'm better then ever with my improved suit," Jake shouted charging at Luna.
Seeing him, Luna said, "Oh please not again my little pink hero. But I am the sporting type. I'll let you have one free punch." Jake's punch connected knocking the vampire to the side, her face smoking.
"What! No mechanical man can stop me!!"
"Like it? I had the suit coated with a light layer of garlic."
Luna struggled to her feet only to have a few small throwing knifes fly into her thanks to Sai.
"AAA! Little hunter you will pay!!" Luna turned into her mistual form and surrounded Sai and reformed with Luna in a deadly bear hug. "Look into my eyes. I will trap your mind in a world of darkness and pain."
"I don't think so." Jake said, "Garlic bomb!" A small grenade launched from the PAT suit and exploded in a yellow cloud of garlic dust. Luna screamed in pain as she dropped Sai, who soon shook off the beginning effects of the vampiress's hypnotic eyes. Steam was now pouring off the vampire. "I'll destroy both of you!" she called charging at them.
"Wait!! What the hell is that!!" Jake cried pointing in some random direction. Both Sai and Luna look in the direction he pointed. Jake grabbed two bottles of holy water from Sai, "Yoink!" and ran up and smashing them over Luna's head who once again screamed in pain.
"That was for my spleen!" Jake shouted. Light suddenly peaked through the skylight above.
"You may have won this round, but you have yet to win the war," Luna said ducking into the shadows and turning into mist leaving Jake and Sai somewhat dumbfounded.

Chapter IV Showdown in the Shadows

The next night Jake and the girls were gathered in the living room. Mina was upset while Sarah was elated.
"No Dawn related crimes in days!! My life's gotten so much easier."
"Ya but Diana disappeared," Mina said unhappily.
"Ya I know her parents called they're in a mad panic," Jake said
"We've got the force on alert to find her," Sarah added.
Suddenly a weird vial was tossed through the window. A piece of cloth was sticking out of it on fire liquid was in the vial.
Jake screamed, "It's a malatove cocktail!!! Duck!!!"
"I thought you said it was malatpbr cocktail, not a flying water foul." Lucia said.  Sarah got up and pulled her to the ground.
The malatove cocktail exploded but instead of raining fiery death down on the room it merely unleased a veil of pure darkness.
"Darkness bomb!!" Sai shouted.  "That vampire is here. Everyone be on guard!!"
Instead of being on guard everyone started tripping over furniture. Somewhere in the madness Katia started screaming. When the veil of darkness lifted everyone was there except Katia.
"Katia, where are you?" Jake shouted
"Damn! She must have taken her!" Sai shouted, "We have to find her now!! Or she'll use that elf princess to plunge this city into eternal darkness!"
"Why does she need Katia to do that?"
"Elf Princesses are the key ingredient for that ritual.  Every vampire knows it and every hunter knows it as well.  We need to find her now!"
"How do you suggest we do that. It's not like she has a chip in her head!" Jake shouted.
"Actually she does," Mato stated.
"I officially apologize for all those times I called you a sick, lonely, perverted old man.....but you're still crazy."
"Here's the transmitter," Mato said handing Jessica  a remote that showed Katia's relative position.
After gathering up some anti-vampire stuff a task force composed of Yuta, Jessica, Sarah, Mina, and Lucia was decided. With Jake staying behind due to dangerousness.  Though after they arrived at Luna's crypt Captain Anime was waiting for them.
"Whazzup?"
"I should arrest you being a vigilante and trespassing in a cemetery but I've got business to attend to," Sarah said.
"I've come to help, and trust me you'll need it," Jake said.
"Fine."
As they entered the cave like crypt the lost souls that had been vampirzed by Luna stalked out of the shadows towards them.
"So many good souls reduced to acting like cockroaches," Sai said.
"That was strangely poetic," Jake said.
One action packed, Matrixy type battle filled with the Bishoujoland team injecting the vampires with Sai's anti-vampire serum, which I'm too lazy to write out in it's entirety, later, the others, sans Yuta, who had stayed behind to guard the sleeping victims, pleged onward into the heart of the tomb. Once they got there they saw an odd alter constructed out of Transantium with Katia lying in center.
"The ceremony is ready to commence. Let this city be plunged into eternal darkness and be the Mecca for all vampires."
"I glady give up my soul for your efforts, mistress," an obviously hypnotized Katia said.
But before the ceremony could start Jake launched a shirieken through one of the supports causing the alter to fall to one side but leaving Katia unharmed.  Luna looked over and stared at the group with hatred in her eyes.
"Timber," Jake said sarcastically.
"You again?!" the enraged vampire shouted. "And I see you've brought along even more friends....Well meet my friends."
As Luna shouted her last lines the vampiric versions of Dawn and Diana burst out of coffins on either side of the tomb.  Their vampiric transformations were more obvious in a succubus and a cat-girl then that of a human. In addition to the fangs, Diana now resembled that more a humanoid bobcat, and Dawn looked more like the devil then a run of the mill succubus.
"Oh crap. It's Dawn and Diana."
"We can't harm them," Lucia said putting away her battle mode flame swords.
"I won't harm Diana, but Dawn is another matter," Sarah said.
"Well, they'll have no qualms about hurting us. And I'm all out of serum so we'll just have to hold them off until we can destroy Luna," Sai said.
With that the fight was on. Dawn quickly smacked Jessica aside before focusing her attack on Sarah, who fired at her with garlic laced rubber bullets. Mina meanwhile was trying to freeze Diana with a freeze spell and with little success as the cat-pire was extremely agile. She eventually got close to Mina and slashed her across the shoulder with her claws making her drop her staff.  She followed up by smacking Mina into the wall of the crypt. A loose stone fell and hit Mina on the head knocking her unconscious. Jake then took over fighting Diana. 
Out in the main hall of the tomb Yuta stood guard over unvampirized people when Barbra approached her.
"What have you done to the mistress's children?  You have taken them away. Now you must pay."
"We don't seem to be seeing eye to eye. But I can remedy that." Yuta said with a smile as her eyes faded into spirals. Barbra stopped in her tracks when her eyes met the hypnotic robo-girls eyes. Proving that she was a more powerful hypnotist then a vampires, Yuta was soon walking around the entranced Barbra, "I really want to have fun with you but it doesn't seem like the right thing to do.  Why don't you go home and return to your old life, remembering nothing that happened. However when I call you and say 'playtime' you will meet with me and we'll have some fun." Barbra gave Yuta her number and began her hypnotized trek home.
Meanwhile Lucia and Sai were busy sword fighting with Luna, Lucia with her swords of fire and Sai with her trusted blade. Luna had shown off another trick by pulling out a black energy sword of chaos. Jessica had recovered from being smacked aside and Sarah and Jessica were attempting a diving tackle of Dawn, but the succu-pire tripped them up with a whip like action from her tail. Meanwhile a nonlethal garlic grenade from Jake had enraged Diana to such a point that she transformed into a true demon cat much like a normal vampire would turn into a wolf or bat. With a quick claw swipe she knocked off the captain anime helmet revealing his identity to a shocked group of people.
"Jake!!?" Sarah and Jessica said with surprise.
"Um, ya, funny story about this, but I'll have to tell you later when we're not in a life and death struggle," Jake said going into a diving roll to avoid Diana's claws.
In the sword fight Lucia had knocked away Luna's sword and then plunged one of her flame swords through the vampiress stomach. After looking horrified at what she had done Lucia innocently said, "I'm sorry, but you're a bad person and tried to hurt my friends."
Sai tried to deliver a stake to the vampiresses heart but she turned into her mist form, and surrounded Diana and Dawn before asorbing them and reforming into a super vampire.
The others stood in fear of the giant succubus, cat, vampire thing.
"Oh crap I've heard of this," Sai said. "And the only thing that can get your friends out and defeat Luna is sunlight but dawn is hours away and we're underground."
"Wait a minute! I have an idea" Jake said as he scooped up his helmet. "Keep her busy. I'll be right back."
The remaining girls looked up at the evil being they were facing.
"Rigggght. Keep her busy he says," Sarah said.
"Bring it on," Jessica shouted.

Jake rushed passed a surprised Yuta and hopped into the Dasher and raced home. After going way too fast and not applying the breaks fast enough he crashed through the dinning room.
" You know there's a little thing called knocking," Mato said.
"Not now. Where's the sunlight generator?"
"Over there. But I should warn you if you wanna use it as a weapon you're gonna need the lifeforce of a pure hearted hero."
"I could never do that to Lucia," Jake said in horror.
"You didn't let me finish. A pure hearted male hero."
"Oh...Well I'm kinda pure of heart...And the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the me. Wait…how'd you know I was going to use it as a weapon?"
"Because I'm a genius."
Ignoring him, Jake grabbed the generator and ran back to the Dasher but the Dasher's computer repeatedly displayed out of order.
"Ah crap. How am I going to get back there?"
"Might I make a suggestion?" Osaka said.

Back in the vampiress's tomb the girls were doing all they could to stay alive when they began to hear a faint rumbling that got steadly louder until Chad with Jake riding him burst into the tomb. Jake dismounted and aimed the generator at the vampiress.
"This is for my friends!" Jake shouted firing the generator while feeling an intense surge of pain within himself. The blast separated the three vampiresses and Jake focused the ray on Luna. "This is for all the people you've hurt!" Jake shouted turning up the intensity of the beam but also the pain he felt within in his body, "And this is for my spleen!" Jake shouted, turning the generator to max. An intense yellow light engulfed the vampiress who disintegrated into a pile of bones as Jake collapsed to the ground.
"Jake!" Jessica and the other girls shouted.
"He's alive," Sarah said with relief.
Dawn and Diana had reverted back to their original forms and Sai smiled at the pile of bones that represented a dead vampire. They then made their way back to the Mato house with Yuta carrying the unconscious Katia, Lucia, Dawn, Jessica Jake, Sarah Mina and Sai Diana.
Later after everyone was laid down and Yuta taking care of the others. Sarah and Jessica looked at Jake who was de-costumed and lying on the couch. They then began to argue about the fate of their friend.
"Though he is our friend he's still a vigilante and he needs to go to jail."
"But he did save the city. But then again justice must be served," Jessica said in agreement.
Osaka entered the discussion, "You know what? Jake is a hero, and I think this city truly needs a hero like him. No matter what your human laws and rules state." She then materialized her pocket watch. "Watch the watch. Watch it swing from side to side. Back and forth. Back and forth. Beginning to relax. Relaxing. Relax for me. Just concentrate on the beautiful watch. It is a beautiful watch. So beautiful that nothing else matter but me, my voice, and of course the beautiful watch. Let everything fade away as you continue to focus on the watch. Let all your stresses and worries melt away as you relax even more for me. Relax. So relaxed you are begining to feel sleepy. So sleepy that your eyelids are beginning to grow heavy. So heavy that by the time I count' backwards from 5 to zero you will no longer be able to hold them open. 5... Still focusing on the watch like good subjects. 4... Eyelids so heavy like lead weights. 3.. So sleepy it's like you haven't slept in a week. 2... Giving up on any resistance and letting yourself give in to the hypnosis. 1... So sleepy, eyelids so heavy, wanting nothing more then to fall asleep for me. Zero now sleep for me." The two girls heads slumped down to their chests. "Now be good girls and just take a little nap for me and when you wake up you will forget ever knowing who Captain Anime was."
"Yes Mistress Osaka," they both said in unison. The two then sat down on the other couch and began their hypnotic slumber. Osaka sat down by Jake and began reading a magazine.

Several days later Jake woke up with Osaka sitting beside him.
"I was expecting Katia to be hovering over me."
"Well her obsessive 'care' for you did more harm then good."
"Where's Sai? I wanna thank her for her help."
"She went back to her own time. She felt she'd screwed with the space time continuum enough for one day."
"And the others?"
"They're fine. Don't seem to remember what happened though."
"What about Jessica and Sarah? they know I'm Captain Anime. I'm surprised I'm not handcuffed right now."
"I hypnotized them into forgetting. And those who didn't see your secret identity, I made up some extremely weird and complex tale about how you arrived during the fight when no one was looking and got knocked out."
"Must have been one hell of a tale if you could get Yuta to believe it when she was guarding the entrance to where we were fighting."
"Oh, it was an epic tale indeed."
"You know what? You're pretty cool when you aren't being sarcastic or hypnotizing my friends to try and kill me."
"Thanks, I think."

A few days later the time was right to be able to send the stranded Kais back to the heavens. Though only one could go back. Osaka let Chad go back, opting to wait a few months and stay with Jake and the crew. As the group dispersed after Chad was sent back, Katia lamented that there was yet another girl in the house that could steal Jake. Though Jake couldn't help but smile when Osaka marched back into the house chanting about wanting Tacos again.